AI Hilariously Roasts Billings, Bozeman, Butte and Great Falls Montana

Let's see how mean the robots can be. Last week, my colleague Ashley asked AI to roast Missoula, Montana. There were some great responses like "You all act like you're living in Portland's little cousin, but really, it's like Portland decided to move into a log cabin and go off the grid for a while"

I chuckled at "Portland's little cousin."

READ MORE: We Asked AI To Roast Missoula Montana And Here's What It said

Now, we're shifting the burns to Billings, Bozeman, Butte and Great Falls. Let's see what ChatGPT can conjure up to roast our Montana brethren.

Billings

It’s the kind of place where the most thrilling event is watching the grass grow, and the local economy thrives on selling “Welcome to Billings” souvenirs to the occasional lost soul who wandered in by mistake. The high point of social life is debating whether to visit the single coffee shop or the other one down the street that’s practically a clone. In Billings, the idea of nightlife is sitting around wondering what people in actual cities do for fun. Even the tumbleweeds are rolling their eyes, thinking, “Seriously, is this it?” It’s the town where the only thing more predictable than the weather is the utter lack of anything remotely exciting happening. -ChatGPT

Translation: Billings, you're boring.

Bozeman

Alright, let’s get into it: Bozeman, Montana—where real cowboys go to get a good laugh at the parade of wannabe ranchers who’ve stumbled in with their faux leather boots and Instagram-ready hats. It’s a place so overrun by “authentic” cowboys that even the cattle are starting to roll their eyes. These city slickers are so busy perfecting their “yeehaw” that they probably think a lasso is a new kind of latte. The town's main street looks like a cowboy costume party where the only thing more out of place than the real western charm is the folks who think a few weeks of “glamping” qualifies them to be ranch royalty. Bozeman’s got more plastic spurs than real cowpoke spirit, and the nearest thing to a genuine cowboy here is the guy at the local boot store pretending he knows how to break in a horse. If you’re looking for authentic cowboy grit, Bozeman’s just the place to remind you that being a cowboy isn’t something you can just order from a catalog. - ChatGPT

 

ChatGPT burns the fake cowboys of Bozeman. We love it. I had to ask for a second burn regarding last year's Brawl of the Wild that left the Bobcats wounded on the field.

Watching Montana State play is like watching a rerun of the same sad movie: you know the plot, you know the ending, and yet you can't help but feel bad for the team that keeps setting itself up for failure. When it comes to the Brawl of the Wild, Montana State's strategy seems to be more about providing the other team with a good laugh than actually putting up a fight.

Butte

It’s like a historical accident that got stuck in a time loop. This town’s so proud of its past that it’s forgotten to move forward. The streets are a maze of broken dreams and broken-down cars, where the local economy seems to revolve around antique shops and sad, empty bars.

How about a shot at Butte's St. Patrick's Day party?

Where the hype is as inflated as the empty beer cans that litter the streets the next day. The town acts like they’ve reinvented the wheel with their “legendary” celebration, but let’s face it: it’s really just a glorified excuse for everyone to drink until they forget why they even bothered. If you’re expecting the kind of lively, spirited festivities you’d find in a major city, Butte’s version feels more like a high school reunion gone off the rails.

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Great Falls

By Great Falls, it became stale. It's a lot of the same shots the AI took at Billings. It's boring, there's no nightlife, tumbleweeds, blah, blah. ChatGPT ran out of steam.