I recently got a new-to-me car. Yes, I know it’s very exciting. No more Cheerios all over the floor or fruit snack wrappers strewn about. No more gum stuck to seats or that boys’ locker room smell. It’s heavenly.

Since my big purchase, I’ve been considering getting a set of vanity plates. I’ve never had a set before but have felt like now might be the right time to take the plunge (now that I’m not tooling around town in a sweet mini-van anymore.)

So, to help me find the perfect plate, I pushed the Google button on the internet machine and viola. This is just a smidge of what I’ve found. Enjoy.

They say the first step towards recovery is admitting you have a problem. – DRUNKY

I know a few ladies that could sport this license plate. Don’t we all? – PMS24-7

Well, at least he’s honest ladies. – VIAGRA

Hilarious. My guess is that this either belongs to a MILF or someone who is into cougars. – GOT MILF

I’m sure this belongs to a teenager. – OMG WTF or IDK LOL

I’m not sure why someone would put this on their own vehicle. However, I think the ladies out there should take it as a warning. – SLZBAG

Creepy or perhaps a homage to the Adam’s family. A license plate on a hearse. – UR NEXT

This license plate was on a Porsche convertible. It seems she got it in the divorce. – WAS HIS

This is a good question. Not a very nice one, but a question I would like answered, none the less. – YRUUGLI

So fitting. This license plate was displayed upside down. – BLOND

This is what my license plate should say. – IAMLATE

For the Star Wars nerds out there. – JEDIIAM

License plate on a Mini Cooper. Hmmm. Weird. – CRAMPED

Probably the best license plate ever. – SPAM

Joy Larson is the mother of four boys, graduate of the University of Montana, animal lover and writer.