Air travel these days is not what it used to be. Prices are higher, connections are more difficult, there are delays, security checkpoints, you have to pay for extra luggage and even a bag of nuts will cost you. There are a few companies that have found ways to compete by offering simplified operations and they have been fairly successful. I’ve also heard of some small regional “no frills” airlines. Here’s how you can tell if you’re booked to fly on one;

  • Before the flight passengers get together and elect a pilot.
  • You can’t board the plane unless you have the exact change.
  • The pilot asks everyone to chip for fuel.
  • The flight attendant asks everyone to fasten their Velcro.
  • All planes have a bathroom and a chapel.
  • Before takeoff the pilot yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway.